Art Journaling – motherhood

Oh motherhood. Parenthood. Adulthood. We have so little time, but so much happens, we learn so much, we have experiences that change and morph us. 

When I was pregnant with my second child I was diagnosed with peri-natal depression. I think I might have had postnatal depression after my first child but I was good at covering it up, the second time round my mood changes and difficulty functioning was harder to hide as it affected my young child too. So I went to my beautiful GP and she gently prescribed me with anti-depressants and affirmed for me that I wasn’t just bad at being a mum, I was sick and needed some help. 

Anti-depressants and regularly seeing my psychologist helped me so much. Another thing that helped me was sharing my journey with a wider group of people, other mothers. I did this through a bit of self lead art therapy and shared my work on instagram. 

The responses were amazing. Sharing took away my shame, and I hope it allowed the shame others may have felt to ease as well. 

This piece on the left spoke to a lot of people. It’s about rage, maybe you’ve never felt like this before and for that I am very glad, but for those of us who have it’s incredibly scary. To lose control, to get so angry and direct it at these tiny little people who you love the most in the world – you don’t think you’re capable of that. It’s a sign that you’re empty, that you’re burnt out, that you have exhausted your energies and your reserves and you need some help. 

That help might look like going to a friends house with your kids so you’re not alone or asking someone to come over to your place. It might be taking some breaths and realigning, regulating. Letting go of those high expectations you have and maybe letting them slide for the day and trying again tomorrow. 

It might look like calling Beyond Blue, Lifeline or the PANDA helpline. 

This one on the right shows the reconciliation. The power of saying sorry. The forgiveness and love that overcomes and heals those harder moments. 

I found drawing my experiences a helpful release, a way to get the thoughts and feelings out of my head. Maybe you might find it helpful too! 

You’re not alone. You’re doing great! Much love, 
Lauren